Grouchy is only fun for so long.

"A bird makes me grouchy." Kindergarten, 2007

The picture above is from a journal entry by a kindergartener I had in class last year. Apparently the bird outside his window woke him up every morning with it's incessant screeching. As soon as I saw this, I laughed and said, "I feel ya, kid." My own experiences with a psychopathic woodpecker last fall had me feeling grouchy as well. Actually, homicidal might be a better word.

I spent the first two weeks of school in a grouchy mood. (Isn't grouchy a funny word? It doesn't seem to really capture the feeling, does it?) Like I mentioned in a previous post, I did a lot of complaining. Mostly I just felt overwhelmed. I'm paying more in rent and bills now, so spending money has been in short supply. (Though, I did some calculating today and I actually have more money in my account than I first thought...Woohoo!...Amazing the changes that come when I give up my attachment to the negative.) I considered taking a part-time job, but I decided that my well-being meant more to me than a few extra dollars.

I don't feel free to discuss my job in much detail here, but the first two weeks were exhausting. I have never been so challenged in my life, and it left me feeling incompetent and hopeless. When I finally decided to stop resisting, the changes were immediate. Literally in one day, the children went from being insane to well-behaved and cooperative. I have had three classroom mothers that have helped so much (one of them actually asked me to let her vacuum my room every day. I kid you not.). These women are cleaning, cutting, gluing, decorating, copying, you name it. I have actually run out of things for them to do! And the kids are doing exactly what I had wanted for them- learning and having fun.

My annoying sinus infection is finally gone. (Never, ever let me be ungrateful for the ability to breathe through my nose again. If I am complaining about something, remind me how freakin' amazing it is to be able to effing BREATHE! Seriously...)

I also got in some Tara and Bob time, which is certainly equivalent to hours of therapy. Laying in bed with your best friend (albeit hungover) watching Super Troopers can do wonders for the soul. Also laying around on the couch pointing out hilarious newspaper articles. Do you notice a theme of laziness? It's bliss, I tell ya.

Thank you, Universe, for a happy classroom, breathing through my nostrils, e-mails from my sister, laughing hysterically with close friends, unexpected help, money in the bank, and lots of hugs.

And more on this later, but I have felt monumental clarity in determining what I really want in this life. Yay for new goals!